"I'm the crime bill! Bang, Bang!"
Supercalafragalisticexpiala-wacky!!! is a song from the episode The Sword and the Dragon. Written by Crow T. Robot as a "topical, satirical review" of the American Government, it is performed on Dr. Clayton Forrester's request to "entertain" a pair of female visitors at Deep 13.
Set-Up
- (In Deep 13, The Mads are sitting on the couch and putting comic books in plastic bags)
- TV's Frank: Clay, have you seen my X-Men #354?
- Dr. Forrester: Frank, you're breaking my concentration. I wanna get all my back issues of Starlog organized in time to tape tonight's episode of TekWars.
- Frank: (mumbling) Oh, TekWars is on. That's right.
- (doorbell rings)
- Dr. Forrester: I wonder who that could be?
- Frank: (still mumbling, going to door) ...that's right, I forgot all about TekWars. We'll have to see... Tonight's episode's supposed to-
- '(Frank opens the door and is met by two girls)
- Bridget: Hi! I'm Bridget and this is my friend Mary Jo. We just moved in upstairs to Deep 12. We're neighbors!
- Frank: (running to couch) Ahhh!! Clay, there are girls here! Actual girls!!!
- Dr. Forrester: Uh, ah, uh, don't panic! (scans the comic-covered table) Um, there must be some instructions on what to do. Somewhere...
- Bridget: (sitting next to Dr. F) Well, we introduced ourselves. Who are you?
- Frank: I have lots of comic books. I keep them in plastic bags.
- Bridget: Oh, yeah, I, heh, heh...
- Mary Jo: We haven't seen the laundry room. Do you know where it is?
- Dr. Forrester: Are we on a date? 'Cause it's okay if we're on a date. Uh, Frank and I have been on, uh, with Frank, yeah, uh... (takes comic book from Bridget, sets it down on table)
- Frank: (after an awkward silence) Babylon 5 was on last night.
- Bridget: Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it sure- it was. Well I-
- Dr. Forrester: Mike, you've got to help us. We're on a date down here. Could you, uh, provide us with some kind of entertainment?
- Bridget: (to camera) Hi.
- (On the Satellite of Love)
- Crow: It just so happens I've written a topical, satirical review that we call...
- All: Supercalafragalistic-expialawacky!!!
- (everybody runs and mutters as the song begins)
Lyrics
- Mike Nelson: (dressed like Uncle Sam) I'm the government,
- I'm the government,
- I'm filled with bloats and perks.
- I'm the government,
- I'm the government,
- I'm the reason nothing works.
- Tom Servo: (speaking, with dollar bills held in his head) Boy, I tell you, it's not easy bein' the working man, but at least I've earned an honest day's wage and I can-
- Mike: Thank you! (takes money out of Servo's head)
- Servo: Heeyyy!
- Crow: (comes out holding a gun) I'm the crime bill: Bang, Bang!
- I'm the crime bill! Bang, Bang!
- I get shot at every day.
- I'm the crime bill! Bang, Bang!
- I'm the crime bill! Bang, Bang!
- I'm opposed by the NRA. Bang, Bang! Ack, ahh! (makes dying noises)
- Mike: (dressed as a little kid and speaking adorably) Hello Mr. Senator. My daddy's out of work, and he says it's because of the deficit. So I saved some money in my piggy bank, and I'm going to give it to you to lower the deficit. If an 8-year-old kid can save money, how come the government can't?
- Servo: Honk honk!
- Crow: Beep beep!
- Servo and Crow: Government gridlock!
- All: Honk honk!
- Crow: Beep beep!
- All: Government gridlock!
- Servo: There's a traffic jam at the Congress intersection,
- Crow: But the light is red unless there's an election!
- Mike: Government sure can get tacky,
- All: It's Supercalafragalisticexpiala-wacky!!!
Aftermath
- (Back at Deep 13, The Mads are laughing and clapping, but the girls are running in mortal terror)
- Dr. Forrester: Oh, ho ho ho! Ho, ho, was that a funny one. That was a stitch!
- Frank: Is nothing sacred you guys?!
- Dr. Forrester: Oh, well... Mike, your movie this week is called The Sword and the Dragon. We won't be watching it 'cause, uh, we're on a date.
- Frank: Yeah, we're on a...
- (both notice the girls have left)
- Dr. Forrester: (dejectedly to Frank) Pass me The Punisher...
- Frank: Better double bag this.
- (On the Satellite)
- All: (singing) That's the Foreign Policy Blues! Ha Ha!
- (Movie Sign is sounded)
- Mike: We got movie sign!
- Crow: What about improv?