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Only Love Pads the Film

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Only Love Pads the Film is a song from episode The Sidehackers.


[On the satellite:]

JOEL: [carries in keyboard] Oh, brother!

TOM: Boy! What a depressing film!

CROW: Yeah! Talk about nihilism. That's the second film in a row that had the hero die in the end.

TOM: Boy, we're never gonna snap outta this existential dilemma.

JOEL: [begins to play keyboard] Oh, I was afraid this would happen, so I brought this thing along.

TOM: Joel, why was the movie so BAD?!

CROW: Yeah! It was cool in the beginning with the sidehacking, then it went right down the drain and they had to pad out the rest of the film with all that killing.

JOEL: Oh, no, Crow. It wasn't killing that padded out the film.

CROW: Huh?

JOEL: Only love pads the film.


When stories were young

And dreams were not done

And sorrow was so far away.

A storybook scene

With songs to be sung

And life--life was just for today.

TOM: Oh, Joel!

JOEL: But nothing lasts forever.

Only love pads the film.

Of all the dreams you treasure

Only love--love pads the film.

TOM: Joel, may I?

JOEL: Please.

TOM: The love that you made

Were two hearts in one.

Our flowers still blow in the wind.


CROW: You give all you take--

A day in the sun--

But even the sun must descend.

JOEL: Everybody, now. Come on.

CROW: Ta-da!

ALL: But nothing lasts forever.

GYPSY: Forever.

ALL: Only love--

GYPSY: Only love--

ALL: --pads the film.

GYPSY: --pads the film.

ALL: Of all the dreams you've treasured--

GYPSY: Treasured--

ALL: Only love--

GYPSY: Only love--

ALL: --love pads the film.

GYPSY: --pads the film.

TOM: Oh, Gyps--

JOEL: We may--the scientists are calling

And now we'd better get going.

Songs edit
"MST3K Love Theme" • "Clay & Lar's Flesh Barn" • "Commando Cody Song" • "Sidehackin'" • "Only Love Pads the Film" • "Wild Rebels Cereal" • "My Creepy Girl" • "If Chauffeurs Ruled the World" • "The Jet Jaguar Song" • "Godzilla Genealogy Bop" • "Tibby, Oh Tibby" • "Idiot Control" • "A Clown in the Sky" • "Hike Your Pants Up" • "Celebrity Siblings" • "The Gamera Song" • "Michael Feinstein's Gamera" • "Annoying Cornjob Song" • "Slow the Plot Down" • "The Plate Spinning Song" • "The Waffle Song" • "Cosmic Freight Train" • "Music from Some Guys in Space" • "Fugitive Alien Medley" • "Sandy Frank Song" • "A Patrick Swayze Christmas" • "City Rap" • "Oh, Kim Cattrall" • "A Danger to Myself and Others" • "Tribute to Pants" • "Satellite of Love Marching Song" • "Ode on Estelle" • "Gypsy Moons" • "Hired!" • "What a Pleasant Journey" • "The Janitor Song" • " Killer Shrews" • "My Wild Irish Ireland" • "Joey the Lemur" • "Master Ninja Theme Song" • "Tubular Boobular Joy" • "Whispering Christmas Warrior" • "Merry Christmas...If That's Okay" • "Rowsdower Saves Us" • "Beverly Hillbillies Parody" • "The Greatest Frank of All" • "Happy Thoughts" • "Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter" • "Livin' in Deep 13" • "Girl in Lovers Lane Theme" • "United Servo Academy Men's Chorus Hymn" • "The Poopy Suit Anthem" • "Square Dance" • "The Many Tunes of Gamera" • "Gypsy Rose Me" • "Bouncy Upbeat Song" • "Who Will I Kill?" • "Supercalafragalisticexpiala-wacky!" • "Satellite Hootenanny" • "Digger Smolken Medley" • "When I Held Your Brain in My Arms" • " Puma Man" • "The Funky Seventies" • "Sodium!" • "Loving Lovers Love" • "Mystos" • "Where, Oh Werewolf" • "Stay!" • "Hobgoblins" • "The Canada Song" • "Phones" • "Air on a Delta Knight" • "The Gods Jam" • "Oh, I Am Sad" • "Bobo Creek" • "To Earth" • "1997 Summer Blockbuster Review Theme" • "1998 Academy of Robot's Choice Awards Special" • "1998 Summer Blockbuster Review Theme" • "Mighty Science Theater" • " Satellite Of Love"

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